Esteemed Lutheran pastor, blogger, and soon-to-be Director of Worship for the LCMS William Weedon likes conspiracy theories. Well, here’s one:

The Opportunity

Our noble president, Matthew Harrison, recently made his way to our fair capital to testify at a congressional hearing. But did he do anything else? President Harrison swiftly left the hearing room, ostensibly to fly back to St. Louis. Was there time for a quick meeting with Rep. Roscoe Bartlett, R-MD? One can imagine the terms when President Harrison got the call: “Sure I’ll come to Washington. But quid pro quo. Get me a meeting with ol’ Roscoe.” “No problem, reverend. But why?” “I’ve got some legislation I want to pitch to him.”

The Pitch

But Roscoe was busy. Being President of the LCMS will get you the royal treatment if you show up at Immanuel, but not so much on Capitol Hill. So our noble president was only allowed to speak to a staffer named Lisa Wright. But Ms. Wright has come through in a big way. According to the Weekly Standard, she referred, apparently without Rep. Bartlett’s knowledge, the Stache Act (Stimulus to Allow for Critical Hair Expenses) to the House Ways and Means Committee. Supported by the American Mustache Institute, the bill would grant a “$250 annual tax deduction for every Mustached American for expenditures on mustache grooming supplies.”

A Critical Connection

I’m not on Facebook, but a simple internet search revealed that President Harrison is a fan of the American Mustache Institute’s Facebook page.

So know we know what really went on when Mr. Harrison Went to Washington.