Here’s how Peter concludes his sermon in Jerusalem on the Day of Pentecost:

 

Repent and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. For the promise is to you and to your children, and to all who are afar off, as many as the Lord our God will call. [NKJ]

 

The problem is this passage is so confusing. Those terrible baby-baptizers try to use this passage to defend their godless traditions. What is needed is a new Bible translation that doesn’t just give us the Apostle’s words, but what they clearly mean. So here’s the correct translation of Acts 2:38-39, with the corrections in bold:

 

Repent and let every one of you—except for the people we obviously don’t mean: those who haven’t reached the age of accountability—be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ as a symbol for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit some other way—obviously not through the baptism I am talking about. For the promise is to you right now and to your children later on, and to all who are afar off, as many as the Lord our God will call after they make a decision for Jesus.

 

That’s obviously much better, but it’s still a little wordy, so we’ll have to simplify it a bit. I’ve started with the NKJ text but put the corrections in italics:

 

Repent and let those of you ready to make a decision be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ as a sign of your obedience, since you’ve already invited the Holy Spirit into your heart. For the decision is yours, and one day perhaps for your children, and to all who are afar off, as many as will decide for the Lord our God.

 

There, now it is so much clearer.